What To Expect When Starting Out In Therapy
Therapy can be difficult. Initially reaching out can be one of the biggest steps you will take. A step towards change can be intimidating as we are creatures of habit and enjoy the predictability and comfort that we already have.
Some reasons people reach out to therapy as they feel they are in place of change or stuckness where things that used to help them cope no longer work like they used to. There are many reasons why individuals seek out therapy and there are no small enough reasons to.
Here are a few things you can expect when starting therapy:
Before your first appointment
It may take a few sessions for you and I to get to know each other. Be patient with yourself and trust the process. If you feel after the first few sessions (typically 2-3) we are not a good fit I will be there to help you find someone who could be a good fit in achieving your goals.
You may feel like you want to prepare for the first session. Reflecting on why you are coming to therapy may be a good place to start. You may want to ask yourself a few questions such as:
How would I like to be?
What do I want to change in my life?
What does a less anxious me look like?
What needs to be different for me to achieve my goals?
You may also want to make a timeline of your life with significant life events to put your life in perspective
During the first session
In the first session, we will go over the informed consent together. Any questions you may have for me are welcome.
The initial session involves intake where I will be asking you a variety of questions about your current life, past experiences, relationships, trauma, sleep, exercise etc. There are no expectations for you to delve into everything all at once and it can take 2 sessions to get to everything.
Unpacking some of the more intimate parts of your life with a stranger like myself can feel vulnerable and unnatural at first and you may experience uncertainty around sharing and opening up. This is normal. Being vulnerable is tough. We can talk through this, and you can take your time sharing certain parts of yourself.
By the end of the first session, I like to check in with my clients and see what the session has been like for them.
Therapy aftercare
At the end of the first session, as well as subsequent sessions, you may experience a variety of feelings. It may feel like a vulnerability “hangover” which honestly, doesn’t always feel nice and may get in the way of coming back to therapy. This is a normal part of the process. Sharing, or feeling like we may have over shared, can lead to feeling vulnerable, perhaps even seen, and heard. This may not be something you experience or have experienced often in your life and may feel uncomfortable. THIS IS NORMAL.
I will often ask what your plans are for after therapy, as well as what is one nice thing you can do for yourself as an act of self-care. I’ll often suggest drinking a glass of water and visualising it as an act of cleansing, however, you are welcome to do anything that is beneficial for you.
Therapy won’t always feel comfortable. After some sessions, you will feel great, and then there are the sessions where you might not feel great and at times worse.
Change is difficult and uncomfortable, and even awkward at times. The transformation process is messy but that’s just it, therapy is a process. We live in a fast-paced world where we want things to be resolved quickly and we want to feel better as soon as we can. This can create impatience with yourself. Let’s start by connecting more deeply with yourself, slowly nurture your inner being and work towards the acceptance and wholeness of yourself.
“We are never our own. We must change this fact. – acceptance.”
